Gnomish Workshop: Living on the Edge (of Unconsciousness)
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Eight on 25 August 2021. (Gnomish workshop door opens) Lennon (in obnoxious good mood): Hi anyone here? ROSTRO: Please state the nature of the mathematical inquiry. Killer DM: Oh good! Lennon, maybe you can help with something. Lennon (still in plastic good mood): Bye, I need to go dive in a gelatinous cube! Killer DM: So when I said “maybe you can help” what I actually meant was “get your pasty bald self in here, you’re helping.” Lennon: Look, my Charisma increased as a warlock, I still can’t help installing things in the machine. ROSTRO: My physical chassis does not require any modification at this time. The Killer DM wishes to delve more into the subject of unconsciousness. Lennon: Ohhhh I get to help with that? I’m pretty sure I still have enough of a strength score to swing a chair. Killer DM: Mmmm, better be careful which chair you…
Archives of Candlekeep: Unbalancing the Scales
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Seven on 18 August 2021. Ryu (obviously vexed): Ostron! Ostron: Yes? Ryu: I have a lot of things I want to say right now but the first one is “What is wrong with you?” Ostron: I think you’ll have to be more specific … Ryu: Do I look like I’m in the mood for jokes? Explain this! Ostron: Um…”Experimentation Proposal Form?” I…I think I was working on this the other day. It was an idea I had, although I nodded off a little bit after. I didn’t think I’d gotten it done. Ryu: So you were actually going to submit this!? Lennon: Hang on, this looks like really neat writing…too neat. Wait, this isn’t written, this is printed … in dot matrix … Ryu: Ah…okay…So I’ll apologize because I think my anger is misplaced. Slightly. Ryu (subvocal mumbling): I really hate that machine. Lennon: (reading the form): Wait…request to have serpentine appendages grafted to shoulder…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-seventh entry: Teenage Mutant Ninja Yuan-ti
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-seventh entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, August 14th, and released Wednesday, August 18th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Archives of Candlekeep: Greyhawk
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Six on 4 August 2021. Lennon: So, Ryu? Ryu: What? Lennon: You’ve been to Greyhawk before, right? Ryu: Ugggggh. Lennon: Um, is that a yes? Ryu: Yeah, but I don’t want to talk about it. Lennon: Why what happened? Ryu (clearly exasperated): I had a bad experience. Lennon: How so? Ryu: Greyhawk is just a mess, okay? Everything is confusing and nobody really pays attention and…I just can’t deal. Lennon: But so much stuff comes out of there. I mean, Mordenkainen, and Tenser…here we are! Ostron! What do you know about Greyhawk? Ostron: Which one? Lennon: What do you mean which one, it’s one place isn’t it? Ostron: No, you’ve got the plane, the city, the plains, the castle- Lennon: Wait wait wait there’s more than one plane of Greyhawk? Ryu: (sighing): No; he means the geography. You know, mostly flat, lots of brownish-yellow plants, large herds of creatures that will stampede over you? Lennon: Oh, okay. Why…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-sixth entry: Megalomaniacal Greyhawk
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-sixth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, July 31st, and released Wednesday, August 4th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Archives of Candlekeep: Thay is not your color
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Five on 28 July 2021. Lennon: Ryu, do you like travel? Ryu: Oh yeah, trips are cool! Where are we going? Lennon: Thay. Ryu: No! Wrong! I told you; stop trying to go weird places and find a new patron! You signed a contract! Deal with the consequences. Besides, Thay’s on the no port list. Lennon: So it’s landlocked? Ryu: No!…wait, is it? Ostron: Yes. Ryu: Good to know, but “no port” as in no teleporting! Lennon: Aww, why can’t we go there? Ryu: Do you want a list? Here, we’ve got a list. Thay is becoming a more prominent part of 5th edition lore as time goes on, but it has been around since 1st edition. A 1st edition adventure module called “Dreams of the Red Wizards” (which the more modern Adventurer’s League adventure is loosely based on) was published by TSR in 1988. While it was placed firmly in the…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-fifth entry: Tin Foil Reborn
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-fifth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, July 24th, and released Wednesday, July 28th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-fourth entry: Ryu’s Hoard of Dragons
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-fourth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, July 17th, and released Wednesday, July 21st over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-third entry: BSOD&D
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-third entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, July 10th, and released Wednesday, July 14th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Unearthed Mundana: How Is Crime Organized?
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Three on 14 July 2021. Ostron: Ryu? Ryu (panicked): I didn’t take it. The hat’s in the vault. Lennon gave me the money for socks. Ostron: Do you even wear socks? I thought you had those footwrap shoe-like things for climbing? Ryu: Let’s change the subject. Did you need something? Ostron: Yeah, I need some materials to repair one of the artifacts and they’re…not the sort of thing you can pick up in the marketplace, if you know what I mean. Ryu: Right. You want the Jinjja Haengbokhan Jeulgeoun Sarinjoe Keurreob. Lennon: Hey! I told you people to stop summoning stuff! Ryu: I wasn’t. That’s the group name: Jinjja Haengbokhan Jeulgeoun Sarinjoe Keurreob. Lennon: Group of what? Demons? Ryu: No! They’re…creatively independent business people. Lennon: Ah, so the thieves’ guild. Ryu: They would consider that kind of insulting. Also they aren’t organized like a guild. Ostron: Does that matter? Ryu: Oh boy. Here, sit down and…