Wisdom of the Masters: When to Take a Break
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Sixty Four on 5 May 2021. (outside the stables) Ryu: All right everyone, I'm packed, I'll see you all later. Lennon: Wait, where are you going? Ryu: I have time off. Lennon: Who authorized that? Ostron: I did. Things are looking to be kind of slow for the upcoming week. And think of it this way, if Ryu's not here, neither is the KDM. Lennon: I suppose that’s true. Ryu: Everyone needs a break, man. You should consider taking one, in fact. Lennon: Nah. No breaks, no sleep, just focussing on the job at hand. It’s never done me any harm. Ostron: Last week you spent three days walking around with a...
Archives of Candlekeep: Modrons
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Sixty Three on 28 April 2021. Ryu: Ostron, I...
Wisdom of the Masters: Clear and Present Danger
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Sixty Two on 21 April 2021. Lennon: Really? You know I thought we were on the same page with this kind of thing but noooooo. Ostron: Look, it's like I said, the best information comes from experts and...
Archives of Candlekeep: Daddy Daughter Date
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Sixty on 7 April 2021. Lennon: Hey Ostron, I'm confused about something. Ostron: And in other news, the sun came up this morning. Lennon: What? Ostron: Never mind, what's confusing you? Lennon: Archdevils. Ryu: Well you're doing okay then, usually they just kill you or trap you in a deal to steal your soul. Lennon: No I haven't talked to any of them, I'm doing research. Ostron: We put that research project on hold, I thought? Lennon: Yeah, this was for...
Archives of Candlekeep: Actual Forgotten Realms: Al Qadim
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Fifty Eight on 24 March 2021. Lennon: There you are! Ostron, I need some teleportation. Ostron: Um, that's not a spell you can use as a Warlock...
Archives of Candlekeep: Take It In Strahd
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Fifty Five on 3 March 2021. Ryu: Okay, I realize the whole warlock thing is hitting you hard but this is too far. Lennon: What? Capes are cool, they should really make a comeback. Ryu: I'm fine with the cape, it's the grey face paint and the red contacts. Isn't that racist or something? Ostron: Against who? Grimlocks? They don't generally raise objections in civil court. Ryu: All right fine, So why are you going all Dracula? It's nowhere near Halloween. Lennon: Well, I figured new class, new Identity, and everyone thinks vampires are cool. Especially this one. Ostron: Which one? Lennon: Come on, I really tried with the makeup...
Archives of Candlekeep: The Archives of Candlekeep
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Forty-eight on 20 January 2021. Lennon: Oh good, there you are. Ryu: Yeah, what do you need stol-aaah recovered? Lennon: Nothing, I need you to help with that. Libby (sadly): Book. Ryu: Um...
Archives of Candlekeep: Glasya – Daddy’s Little Devil
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Forty-seven on 23rd December 2020. Ryu (breathlessly): Oh good, you guys are here. Lennon: Um, yes, are you okay? Ryu: Maybe? Are there side effects to chaining bless spells? Ostron: Why is that a question? Ryu: Look, KayDee is desperately trying to get involved with the Glasya research and I'm fairly sure that will end with her trying to summon the archdevil for a chat. I decided I needed an extra boost so I've been getting Gath to bless me continually. Ostron: I don't know about any side effects but you certainly look like you're under a lot of strain. Ryu: Yeah, well, you better hope I can hold...
Archives of Candlekeep: Moloch: Always Swipe Left
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Forty-five on 9th Decembet 2020. Killer DM: Oh whatever. Ryu for some reason asked Ostron for this research assignment and then she foisted it off on me! Can you believe it? The nerve! Ostron: Oh, she gave *you* the Moloch research? That's a very...
Archives of Candlekeep: Pack It Up, Folks!
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Forty on 5th November 2020. (roaring) Ostron: I didn't just hear that. (roaring) Ostron: No, okay, I did hear that. We're Omega Black people, this is not a drill! Libby (panicked): Book! RaeRae: Getting the cover on the scrying pool. Gath: Securing potions. Lennon: Why didn't we set up an alarm for this kind of thing? (roaring) RaeRae: Did you not hear that? It is the alarm! Where's Ryu? Killer DM (amused): Oh my. What is going on here? RaeRae: That figures. Gath (sighing): Let me go find my diamonds. Ostron: I suppose you're the cause of all this? Killer DM: Well all this panicking and running around, no, although it is amusing. But if you mean the Tarrasque, then...
Archives of Candlekeep: To Rule in Hell
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Thirty-nine on 28th October 2020. Ryu: Lennon? Lennon: Darn it...
Archives of Candlekeep: It’s a treasure chaaaah!
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Thirty-eight on 14th October 2020. Ryu: Okay, we're back from the market and...
Archives of Candlekeep: Mister Elminster
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Thirty-six on 30th September 2020. Ostron: All right, buckle up folks, it's time to talk about Elminster. Ryu: Oh good I had a bunch of other things to get done. Lennon: Yeah, I'm going to fit a few things in the schedule and ...
Archives of Candlekeep: Mordenkindof a Big Deal
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Thirty-five on 23rd September 2020. Ryu: Lennon? Lennon: What? I put your knives back this time, I didn't even leave any of them sticking in the fireplace. Ryu: Right, thanks for that, but I thought Ostron wanted you to work on the notes about Mordenkainen? Lennon: I did! They're right here. Ryu: That's five sheets of paper and a post-it. Lennon: Oh that's where that went. Yeah, the post-it was just a reminder that I need to get more coffee. We're out of coffee by the way. Ryu: You just went to the market. Lennon: But recall, I lost the post-it. Ryu: Ugh. Oh, Ostron, there you are. Did you check Lennon's...
Archives of Candlekeep: Some Call Her… Tasha
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Thirty-three on 9th September 2020. Killer DM: Anthony, darling, nice of you to join us here. You’re a detective sort, so tell me, why has Ostron been hiding these notes away when they're clearly about the best wizard ever? Tony: Oh, yeah, I’ve heard about what happens when Ryu puts on the hat. Besides, it looks like he wasn't hiding them, he just put them under this book so they wouldn't blow away. Libby: Book! Tony: Uh, yeah, I guess, you can take that back now. Oh, and I’m a lawyer by the way, not a detective. Killer DM: Another Rules Lawyer? Fine. With...
Archives of Candlekeep: Neverwinter
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Twenty One on 3rd June 2020. Ostron: Ryu. Ryu: What? Ostron: You know Libby doesn't like people taking books from the annex. It had Lennon wandering around in a confused stupor for an entire day when he forgot to bring back an atlas. Ryu: How could you tell? Ostron: Honestly only because I saw Libby hit him with an eye ray. Lennon: Hey is that from the annex? You know Libby- Ryu: Yes, I heard, don't worry; this isn't one of Libby's books. It's my list for our trip to Neverwinter! Ostron: Luskan silk skirt, decorative water clock...
Archives of Candlekeep: Baldur’s Gate
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Twenty on 27th May 2020. Killer DM: Lennon Lennon: I didn't do it! You can't make me! I'll never talk! Killer DM: Well all of that is patently false but at the moment I'm more interested in why you think a cape and a mask are necessary to visit Baldur's Gate? Lennon: I...
Unearthed Mundana: Archaic Measurements
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Ten on 11th March 2020. ROSTRO: Please state the nature of the mathematical inquiry Lennon: Okay, so I don't like this any more than you do, but if we both buckle down, we can get through this. ROSTRO: Nothing you stated constitutes a question Ryu (angrily sarcastic): I have one: Why is that thing humming? Lennon: Um, it does that when it's on. Ryu: Do you see my face? Do I look like I'm in the mood for that kind of backtalk? Lennon: Well look, I was trying to figure out the out the shopping list this week, and- Ryu: Oh again with you and the shopping? Here, gimme. Ryu (flipping...
Archives of Candlekeep: Ooze On First
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Eight on 26th February 2020. Lennon: Ostron, I need you to sign this purchase order. Ostron: What's it for? Lennon: Cleaning supplies. Ryu: Why do we need new cleaning supplies? Lennon: Apparently HR has determined mops are a safety hazard and they're being abused by certain quasi-members of the staff. Ryu: Okay, you have to admit it was kind of funny when KayDee broke that slime trail and the Gath duplicate spilled the potion into itself and it was all glowy for a bit before it evaporated. Ostron: Hang on, this says the replacement cleaning supplies are more oozes! Lennon: What? where does it say that? Ostron: Requisition: 4 cubes, gel. 2...
Archives of Candlekeep: Planar Tour: The Outer Planes
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seven on 19th February 2020. Mikey: Come on, come on, no! ROSTRO start-up sounds Mikey: Darn it! Ryu: I thought you were keeping an eye on him! Mikey: Yeah, but there was this footnote Lennon wanted me to check out for him about the cosmological disposition of Eberron in the planar landscape and- Ryu: And now you're starting to sound like that thing. ROSTRO: Please state the nature of the mathematical inquiry. Ryu: Yeah, why did Ostron decide he needed your help with the planes? ROSTRO: Once cosmological analysis of planes in Dungeons and Dragons moves beyond the elemental planes, the number of areas to be considered increases by a...
Archives of Candlekeep: Planar Tour: Elemental
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Six on 12th February 2020. Ryu: So I believe the other day you were saying something to me that sounded roughly like "oh dear gods why?" Lennon: That was to the Killer DM, not you. Ryu: Fine, but I think I have a valid reason to ask you the same question? Ostron: Oh my...
Archives of Candlekeep: Planar Tour: Feywild
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Five on 29th January 2020. Lennon: Oh dear gods why? Killer DM: Ryu's faerie dragon's gone back to the feywild for a bit. Ostron: And she didn't want to go with it? Killer DM: Oh goodness no. Every time she goes there I get into a fight. Lennon: I thought most feywild creatures were a little less aggressive than that? Killer DM: First of all, are you kidding? Second, I didn't say Ryu got into a fight; I get into a fight. Lennon: Don't tell me you have outstanding geases or something. Ostron: I thought you dealt in flaming horses. You're doing birds now? Lennon: What? Oh, wait are you kidding? Do...
Archives of Candlekeep: Planar Tour: Shadowfell
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Four on 22nd January 2020. Lennon (storytelling): It was a dark and stormy night Ryu: I'm not hearing a storm Lennon (storytelling sarcastically): Because someone is slacking off Ostron: At this point I've already used four spell slots just on ambiance. Magical darkness, mist cloud, control weather, wind gust, now you want lightning on command? Lennon: … well I’ve gotta set the mood right Ryu: Wouldn't it be easier to just meet in the Shadowfell at this point? Lennon: Well...
Archives of Candlekeep: Psionics: The knowledge everyone hates
This article was first broadcast in Episode Ninety Four on 30th October 2019. Lennon: Hey Ostron, I have a question Ostron: No, it is not possible to use Peaches as a ramp for your bicycle if she angles her tail the right way. Ryu: No abusing my dinosaur! I will allow her to eat you! Lennon: Okay, that wasn't the question, though thank you for ruining my fun once again. My actual question is why are we starting this short rest with psionics in 3rd edition? Doesn’t it make more sense to start with 1e? Ostron: Oh, well, psionics from 1st and 2nd edition had convoluted and problematic rules that make it fairly...
Archives of Candlekeep: Psionics: The knowledge you never knew you forgot
This article was first broadcast in Episode Ninety Three on 23rd October 2019. Ostron: Really? You guys really want to do this? Ryu: Look, everyone keeps going on and on about psionics- Ostron: I don't. I try to avoid it, actually Lennon: Yes, but that's the point; people don't quite know why. What's wrong with psionics, why is it such a touchy subject? Ostron: All right, fine, follow me. Libby: Book Ostron: Thanks. Here. Ryu: ...
Archives of Candlekeep: Eberron Mechanics and Gameplay
This article was first broadcast in Episode Ninety One on 2nd October 2019. Mikey: Oooooh, this is what Ryu meant by “that big, magic-mechanical monstrosity starts using big words at us”! ROSTRO: While her intent with the labeling was no doubt pejorative, the choice of vocabulary was interestingly accurate. Mikey: … I see what she means. ROSTRO: I would also bring to your attention that given the topic being discussed, my participation could be considered verisimilitudinous. Lennon: Actually, that is a point. Huge machine run by magic is very Eberron. As we discussed previously, Eberron as a setting represents a significant departure from playing in the Forgotten Realms version of the game. However, lest...
Archives of Candlekeep: The Blood War
This article was first broadcast in Episode Ninety on 25th September 2019. Ryu: All right, so lets cover this again. The Blood War is not...
Archives of Candlekeep: Eberron: Origin and Lore
This article was first broadcast in Episode Eighty Nine on 18th September 2019. Ostron: Oh bright Pelor what are all those colors? *sound of knife throwing* Lennon: Aww Ryu! You cut the fuse! Though that was a good shot with the knife! Ryu: Thanks. And you’re not setting off fireworks in here. We said you could do a couple of short rests focused on Eberron, not throw a party! Lennon: You guys always ruin my fun! Ryu: Really? You want me to get the hat? Lennon: Even that couldn’t bring me down, I'm having a great time, this is wonderful! Let me just go get the notes. Ostron: Keep in mind, if those notes required an actual...
Archives of Candlekeep: Ambulatory Corpses
This article was first broadcast in Episode Eighty Eight on 11th September 2019. ROSTRO: Please state the nature of the mathematical inquiry Ryu: First, you called us, second, what does this topic have to do with math? ROSTRO: The exercise involved more comparative analysis and referencing information from extraplanar sources than engaging in mathematical activities but my resources remained invaluable. It is also likely the handwritten note provided by Lennon was misinterpreted by Ostron. Ryu: Let me...
Archives of Candlekeep: The Nine Hells Primer
This article was first broadcast in Episode Eighty Seven on 4th September 2019. Lennon: Ostron said he was in the Candlekeep annex? Ryu: Yeah, he wanted-...
Archives of Candlekeep: Revisiting Realism
This article was first broadcast in Episode Eighty One on 24th July 2019. Ryu: I want it noted for the record that I’m really trying to solve this without the hat. Gath: Solve what? Did we have a fight on-air I wasn’t aware of? Ryu: No, no, this is with my players. I’ve got a couple that are whining about wanting more realism and they really don’t know what they’re asking for. Ostron: The Killer DM already covered some of the variant rules the DMG says make things more realistic. Ryu: Yeah, these players are still whining. Ostron: Ugh, yeah, they don’t know what they’re asking for. Gath: What’s the problem? As we’ve discussed previously, and as...
Archives of Candlekeep: Spelljammer Part 2: An Overview
This article was first broadcast in Episode Seventy One on 1st May 2019. Ryu: Okay so now I'm morbidly curious. If Spelljammer's lore was so crazy, how did that work with gameplay? Lennon: Awesomely, I'm sure. Ostron: Did Spelljammer pay off your mortgage or something? Lennon: So far it's D&D in space, there are 7ft hippos with muskets and I get to throw Kender out of airlocks. I'm sold. Ostron: Well there weren't actually airlocks, you know. Spelljammer is presented as a separate campaign setting that uses spaceships, space, and planets to substitute for horses, open plains, and cities. The original sourcebook explains the separation as willful apathy: people...
Archives of Candlekeep: Spelljammer Part 1: the Lore
This article was first broadcast in Episode Seventy on 24th April 2019. Lennon: I don't understand why you're against it. Ostron: I'm not against it, I just don't understand why you're so in favor of it. I mean, what do you actually know about spelljammer? Lennon: It's D&D...
Wisdom of the Masters: The KDM’s Christmas Gifts
This article was first broadcast in Episode Fifty-Four on 26th December 2018. Killer DM: Oh there you are Lennon. So nice to see you again. I can't help noticing it's Christmas Lennon: Yes Kay- Killer DM: Go ahead. Try using that name Lennon: -Killer DM. I just can't begin to tell you how good it is to see you. It's your first anniversary isn't it? Killer DM: It is, but you know what it's not? Lennon: What? Killer DM: Thanksgiving. Do you remember anything about Thanksgiving? Lennon: Um..no? Because I'm British? Ostron: Still can't get the power cells to recharge right, I wonder...
Wisdom of the Masters: Decking your Campaign
This article was first broadcast in Episode Fifty-Three on 19th December 2018. Ryu: Wow Lennon, that's...
A Short Rest: Archives of Candlekeep: 4th Edition, the Rebellious Child
This article was first broadcast in Episode Fifty-One on 5th December 2018. The fifth edition of Dungeons and Dragons is arguably one of the most popular iterations of the rules, but it’s taken some time to get to where we are today. In honor of Art and Arcana, the book released October 23rd that showcases all the artwork and tells the evolving story of D&D over the years, we decided to take a look back at this hobby of ours ourselves and see where it started, and how it’s evolved over time. In June 2008, Wizards of the Coast released the 4th...
Archives of Candlekeep: Edition 3.5: The Golden Child
This article was first broadcast in Episode Fifty on 28th November 2018. The fifth edition of Dungeons and Dragons is arguably one of the most popular iterations of the rules, but it’s taken some time to get to where we are today. In honor of Art and Arcana, the book released October 23rd that showcases all the artwork and tells the evolving story of D&D over the years, we decided to take a look back at this hobby of ours ourselves and see where it started, and how it’s evolved over time. As established in our last article, while everyone liked 3.0 as...
Archives of Candlekeep: 3rd Edition: The Friendly, Embarrassing Child
This article was first broadcast in Episode Forty-Nine on 14th November 2018. The fifth edition of Dungeons and Dragons is arguably one of the most popular iterations of the rules, but it’s taken some time to get to where we are today. In honor of Art and Arcana, the book released October 23rd that showcases all the artwork and tells the evolving story of D&D over the years, we decided to take a look back at this hobby of ours ourselves and see where it started, and how it’s evolved over time. When D&D came under the control of Wizards of the Coast,...
A Short Rest: Archives of Candlekeep: 2nd Edition; the temperate, responsible
This article was first broadcast in Episode Forty-Eight on 7th November 2018. The fifth edition of Dungeons and Dragons is arguably one of the most popular iterations of the rules, but it’s taken some time to get to where we are today. In honour of Art and Arcana, the book released October 23rd that showcases all the artwork and tells the evolving story of D&D over the years, we decided to take a look back at this hobby of ours ourselves and see where it started, and how it’s evolved over time. By the late 1980s, D&D had become even larger but...
Archives of Candlekeep: The Fraternal Twins: AD&D and the Basic Set…
This article was first broadcast in Episode Forty-Five on 13th October 2018. The fifth edition of Dungeons and Dragons is arguably one of the most popular iterations of the rules, but it’s taken some time to get to where we are today. In honor of the upcoming Art and Arcana book, releasing October 23rd that showcases all the artwork and tells the evolving story of D&D over the years, we decided to take a look back at this hobby of ours ourselves and see where it started, and how it’s evolved over time. By 1977, four years after the original release of D&D,...
Archives of Candlekeep: In The Beginning…
This article was first broadcast in Episode Forty-Four on 10th October 2018. The fifth edition of Dungeons and Dragons is arguably one of the most popular iterations of the rules, but it’s taken some time to get to where we are today. In honor of the upcoming Art and Arcana book, releasing October 23rd that showcases all the artwork and tells the evolving story of D&D over the years, we decided to take a look back at this hobby of ours ourselves and see where it started, and how it’s evolved over time. Late in the year 1970, Gary Gygax and Jeff Perran...
Archives of Candlekeep: Odd Dragon Out
This article was first broadcast in Episode Thirty-Five on 8th August 2018. Ryu: Now? Now? Can we do it now? Lennon: Yes, fine, go ahead Ryu: Yaaaay! THUNK Ostron: What is that? Ryu: That's my notes on all the other dragons Lennon: *sigh* okay, we can cover SOME of them. Pick the ones most people will recognize, at least. Ryu: Fine...
Archives of Candlekeep: Behold the Beholders
This article was first broadcast in Episode Thirty-Three on 25th July 2018. Mikey: So this is backstage, huh? Ryu: You’ve never been here before? Mikey: They don’t let me leave the cave that often… thumbing through papers What’s this? Lennon: Those are some notes that Ostron was having difficulty compiling. Mikey: What happened to the research beholders? Ryu: Well, this is ON beholders, specifically their history, so when he tried to get their help they all just passed in their own life stories and said that's all he needed to know. Mikey: Ah, yeah...
Archives of Candlekeep: Never Enough, the Story of the Hit Point
This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Nine on 20th June 2018. Lennon: Holy mother of Avandra, that stings… Are you nearly done Ostron: Oh will you quit whining?! And hold still otherwise I can’t stitch it properly Lennon: I nearly lost an arm to that allegedly juvenile dragon Ryu: It was so pretty though. The way its scales glistened in the moonlight...
Archives of Candlekeep: Dragons
This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Seven on 6th June 2018. Lennon: Ryu… are you ok? Ryu: *disappointed* Yeah, it’s fine… just… why’d they put “Dragon Heist” in the title if it’s nothing to do with dragons? Lennon: Yeah, I’m sorry, though Dungeon of the Mad Mage might have them… Ostron: Ok guys, I’ve finished my article on Comparative analysis of Ranged vs Melee Damage per Class and-- Ryu, are you alright? Ryu: Yeah, it’s fine… Lennon: You know… I don’t really know much about the history of dragons Ostron: Yeah you do, you’re the one who told me about-- why are you looking at me like tha--- oooh! Yeah, he knows nothing. Lennon: Right,...
Getting Defensive: Armor Class
This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Five on 23rd May 2018. Lennon: Ahh, there you are! What’re you doing down here in the basement? Ryu: Well, I’ve been flicking through Mordenkainen’s Tome of Foes, and I’ve gotta be honest I’m not sure I fancy our chances going up against those… things! Demons and devils, demogorgons and drow, it’s all gotten a little more dangerous. Lennon: So you’re hiding down here with a blanket? Ryu: What? NO! I just-- Ostron: Ryu?! Ryu?! Lennon: I found her, she’s down here Ostron: Ahh, there you are! What’re you doing down here in the basement? Ryu: As I was just about to say to Lennon, I was just going through...
Plane Shift: Ixalan
This article was first broadcast in Episode Eleven on 14th February 2018. Ryu: Hey Len, everything alright? Lennon: Ehhhh, kinda. It’s Valentine’s day and I’ve still not managed to find anything for my wife. Even with my ukulele my Performance check would be a critical failure what with still recovering from the Ryuflu, and just in case the Ryuflu turns out to be lycanthropy, moonlit walks on the beach are probably best avoided...
The Gith
This article was first broadcast in Episode Ten on 7th February 2018. Lennon: Are you crazy!? Ostron: Will you calm down and listen! Ryu: Why is everyone yelling in here!? Lennon: He has a silver sword Ostron: It's a sword that LOOKS silver, it's not one of THOSE silver swords. Do I look like an idiot? Lennon: Well you work on this show, don’t you? Ryu: What am I missing here? Ostron: I'm guessing a lot of history about the Githyanki Whenever psionics comes up in D&D, three races are always brought up with it: the Mindflayers, Githyanki, and Githzerai. We're going to discuss the latter two. Fortunately the...