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Author: Ostron

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Archives of Candlekeep: Odd Dragon Out

This article was first broadcast in Episode Thirty-Five on 8th August 2018. Ryu: Now? Now? Can we do it now? Lennon: Yes, fine, go ahead Ryu: Yaaaay! THUNK Ostron: What is that? Ryu: That's my notes on all the other dragons Lennon: *sigh* okay, we can cover SOME of them. Pick the ones most people will recognize, at least. Ryu: Fine...

Archives of Candlekeep: Behold the Beholders

This article was first broadcast in Episode Thirty-Three on 25th July 2018. Mikey: So this is backstage, huh? Ryu: You’ve never been here before? Mikey: They don’t let me leave the cave that often… thumbing through papers What’s this? Lennon: Those are some notes that Ostron was having difficulty compiling. Mikey: What happened to the research beholders? Ryu: Well, this is ON beholders, specifically their history, so when he tried to get their help they all just passed in their own life stories and said that's all he needed to know. Mikey: Ah, yeah...

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Adventurer’s Journal: Elemental Wizards

This article was first broadcast in Episode Thirty-One on 11th July 2018. Ostron: Lennon? Did you take my dictionary out of the gnomish workshop? Lennon: I did, and then the research beholders took it. Ryu: Weren't you working on elemental wizards? Ohhh you meant to grab a spellbook and ended up with the dictionary instead didn't you? Lennon: No!...

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Adventurer’s Journal: Efficient Use of Infernal Influence

This article was first broadcast in Episode Thirty on 27th June 2018. Killer DM: Is it “die” when there’s more than one? Or is it “dice”? One die, two dice? I always forget. Anyway, 15 people are dead. Lennon: I'm not sure what that has to do with anything, but tell me why did Ryu decide to put the Killer DM hat on? Killer DM: Well, Ryu knew you were talking about Devils and I've always done some of my best work with them, so I...

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Unearthed Mundana: Truly Exotic Weapons

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Eight on 13th June 2018. Lennon: Hey guys, can you help me out with something?  I’ve been trying to make some locations in my game a little more exotic, and it got me thinking. I can flavor the buildings, sights, sounds and smells, even the names and local customs, but everyone still has shortswords, longbows and all those mundane types of weaponry. It reminded me of when we went to Ixalan. Ryu: Because your party’s wizard almost got them all killed? Ostron: Okay look- Lennon: Hey, hey, we’re talking about my problem here. Remember those blades the merfolk carried? They looked...

Archives of Candlekeep: Dragons

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Seven on 6th June 2018. Lennon: Ryu… are you ok? Ryu: *disappointed* Yeah, it’s fine… just… why’d they put “Dragon Heist” in the title if it’s nothing to do with dragons? Lennon: Yeah, I’m sorry, though Dungeon of the Mad Mage might have them… Ostron: Ok guys, I’ve finished my article on Comparative analysis of Ranged vs Melee Damage per Class and-- Ryu, are you alright? Ryu: Yeah, it’s fine… Lennon: You know… I don’t really know much about the history of dragons Ostron: Yeah you do, you’re the one who told me about-- why are you looking at me like tha--- oooh! Yeah, he knows nothing. Lennon: Right,...

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Massive Battles

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Six on 30th May 2018. Lennon: Ok, so two plus two is four, minus one that’s three Ryu: What on earth are you doing? Other than quick maths? Lennon: I’m doing a dry run of a thing for a game. See, I may have painted myself into a corner a bit… or rather into a wide open-field that’s about to be filled with 25,000 creatures on 3 sides, each vying for control of the county RaeRae: And, let me guess, you’re trying to figure out the damage received during a single round of combat? Lennon: Combat? I’ve not even gotten as far as...

Bounded Accuracy

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Four on 16th May 2018. Ryu: Lennon? Why did we just get a delivery of 500 yards of parachute cord? Lennon: Oh did that show up? Great! Yeah it’s a research project I’m doing about bounded accuracy. Ryu: Okay...

Listen, Good People

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-Three on 9th May 2018. Ryu: Okay, no more weddings. Lennon: I didn't realize you were ordained. Ryu: No, I mean I added an arranged marriage plot to my campaign and my characters started fighting about how the "good" aligned characters would react. Ostron: That can get tricky. Ryu: I didn't even know how to rule it myself. I just play my characters, I usually don't think too much about alignment. Well, unless I'm wearing the hat… Lennon: No Hat! Ostron: It's okay, don't need the hat. I've got a quick primer on being good here. Depending on the crowd of players at the table, the announcement that...

Probability

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twenty-One on 25th April 2018. Ryu: Are you sure about this? Lennon: I think we have to Ryu: I'm getting the hat Lennon: No, no… Let’s just let him have this one. Ryu: You're REALLY sure? I mean, last time some people didn't wake up for days. Lennon: Well, we can dress it up as a public service. Insomnia is a real issue for a lot of people. Now, breathe in… and out… ok, go get em! Ryu: Okay… Hey Ostron? What'cha been working on in the Gnomish Workshop?     With all of this talk of Mordenkainen’s Mayhem, and the Mike Mearls...

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Switching Characters

This article was first broadcast in Episode Seventeen on 28th March 2018. Ostron: One of my players used the sending stone, they want to change characters AGAIN. It's something like the fourth time and I have no idea what to do here. Lennon: What are they now? Ostron: Gnome Cleric Lennon: And they're switching to… Ostron: Goliath Barbarian Ryu: That's...

To Add A Dragon

This article was first broadcast in Episode Sixteen on 21st March 2018. Raerae: So were you guys debating dragons this week? Ryu: No Raerae: Why not? Ryu: Because there isn't a debate. Ostron: No, the point is that we're asking if you should add dragons to a campaign or not. Ryu: I don't understand the question. Ostron: I'm not sure how to rewrite that Ryu: Look, here, guys, why don't we just read over this paper I wrote up on dragons instead, huh? Dragons are probably the most iconic creatures in the entire D&D mythos. I mean, they're the second "D" in the name; it's hard to argue they...

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Are You Evil?

This article was first broadcast in Episode Fifteen on 14th March 2018. Lennon: Really? You just GAVE her the hat? Ostron: Look, it's not like The Killer DM causes chaos or anything. She's Lawful Evil, that's manageable. Killer DM: Do I hear the sounds of overconfidence? Lennon: Not from me Ostron: We were just saying you're a good source of information for players that want to play evil characters Killer DM: Oh my goodness yes. There are soooo many posers out there that think they're SO evil and still go to puddles when there are a bunch of kittens around. Pull up a chair, people.       At some...

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Healing Without Healing

This article was first broadcast in Episode Fourteen on 7th March 2018. Lennon: Ok, so I’ve been thinking about our Ixalan adventure… well, mis-adventure… and I think I’ve gotten to the bottom of it. We need a cleric. Ryu: No we don’t Ostron: Right -- a paladin would probably be better. They can absorb more damage. Ryu: Wrong again Lennon: Ok, well what do you suggest? Ryu:  Well, I find that depends on how you look at it.   The easiest way to guarantee blind panic in most players is to drain the group’s healer of spell slots or hit points. Some players refuse to engage in a...

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Party Composition

This article was first broadcast in Episode Twelve on 21st February 2018. Lennon: That was close! Ryu: Next time we go to Ixalan, we should probably balance our party better. Ostron: Now we're safe backstage, let’s take a Short Rest...

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Royal Titles

This article was first broadcast in Episode Six on 3rd January 2018. Lennon: Why does the break room wall have dry erase lines everywhere with some pictures of Duke Ellington, Elvis, and Christopher Lee from Star Wars? Ostron: Oh, yeah, we wanted to add some stuff to our campaigns and have it be authentic. Royalty! Kings, Princes, Dukes. I mean an evil baron- Ryu: Or Baroness! Ostron: -right trying to take over the kingdom is classic! But we wanted it to be authentic and we’re not used to the whole royalty, lines of succession thing. Lennon: Ryu, Ostron, I’m British. We’ve got this. Here’s your...