Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-ninth entry: I Accidentally Polymorphed Myself into a Sheep
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-ninth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Sunday, August 29th, and released Wednesday, September 1st over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Adventurer’s Journal: Time for a New Look
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Nine on 1 September 2021. Lennon (groaning painfully): Okay…chair…nice chair…ohh – except it’s not padded. At least it’s not a mimic. The Mimic: One in six chance…should have listened when that machine was talking. Ryu: What, you’re talking to yourself now? Lennon: It’s not…you know what, I don’t even care anymore. Ostron: What happened to you? Lennon: I was talking to RaeRae and I asked her why she didn’t choose to be a Moon Druid because otherwise she can never turn into any useful animals. Ryu: Oh boy. I imagine her staff of troll smiting was part of the chat after that? Lennon: I don’t think I’ll be sitting right for a while. I don’t feel I deserved it though. Ostron: Why’s that? Lennon: Well, I mean I was right! The other druids all end up becoming casters, they can’t get any really powerful creature forms. Ryu: You haven’t actually worked with many…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-eighth entry: One Foot In The Grave
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-eighth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, August 21st, and released Wednesday, August 25th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Gnomish Workshop: Living on the Edge (of Unconsciousness)
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Eight on 25 August 2021. (Gnomish workshop door opens) Lennon (in obnoxious good mood): Hi anyone here? ROSTRO: Please state the nature of the mathematical inquiry. Killer DM: Oh good! Lennon, maybe you can help with something. Lennon (still in plastic good mood): Bye, I need to go dive in a gelatinous cube! Killer DM: So when I said “maybe you can help” what I actually meant was “get your pasty bald self in here, you’re helping.” Lennon: Look, my Charisma increased as a warlock, I still can’t help installing things in the machine. ROSTRO: My physical chassis does not require any modification at this time. The Killer DM wishes to delve more into the subject of unconsciousness. Lennon: Ohhhh I get to help with that? I’m pretty sure I still have enough of a strength score to swing a chair. Killer DM: Mmmm, better be careful which chair you…
Archives of Candlekeep: Unbalancing the Scales
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Seven on 18 August 2021. Ryu (obviously vexed): Ostron! Ostron: Yes? Ryu: I have a lot of things I want to say right now but the first one is “What is wrong with you?” Ostron: I think you’ll have to be more specific … Ryu: Do I look like I’m in the mood for jokes? Explain this! Ostron: Um…”Experimentation Proposal Form?” I…I think I was working on this the other day. It was an idea I had, although I nodded off a little bit after. I didn’t think I’d gotten it done. Ryu: So you were actually going to submit this!? Lennon: Hang on, this looks like really neat writing…too neat. Wait, this isn’t written, this is printed … in dot matrix … Ryu: Ah…okay…So I’ll apologize because I think my anger is misplaced. Slightly. Ryu (subvocal mumbling): I really hate that machine. Lennon: (reading the form): Wait…request to have serpentine appendages grafted to shoulder…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-seventh entry: Teenage Mutant Ninja Yuan-ti
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-seventh entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, August 14th, and released Wednesday, August 18th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Archives of Candlekeep: Greyhawk
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Six on 4 August 2021. Lennon: So, Ryu? Ryu: What? Lennon: You’ve been to Greyhawk before, right? Ryu: Ugggggh. Lennon: Um, is that a yes? Ryu: Yeah, but I don’t want to talk about it. Lennon: Why what happened? Ryu (clearly exasperated): I had a bad experience. Lennon: How so? Ryu: Greyhawk is just a mess, okay? Everything is confusing and nobody really pays attention and…I just can’t deal. Lennon: But so much stuff comes out of there. I mean, Mordenkainen, and Tenser…here we are! Ostron! What do you know about Greyhawk? Ostron: Which one? Lennon: What do you mean which one, it’s one place isn’t it? Ostron: No, you’ve got the plane, the city, the plains, the castle- Lennon: Wait wait wait there’s more than one plane of Greyhawk? Ryu: (sighing): No; he means the geography. You know, mostly flat, lots of brownish-yellow plants, large herds of creatures that will stampede over you? Lennon: Oh, okay. Why…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-sixth entry: Megalomaniacal Greyhawk
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-sixth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, July 31st, and released Wednesday, August 4th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.
Archives of Candlekeep: Thay is not your color
This article was first broadcast in Episode One Hundred Seventy Five on 28 July 2021. Lennon: Ryu, do you like travel? Ryu: Oh yeah, trips are cool! Where are we going? Lennon: Thay. Ryu: No! Wrong! I told you; stop trying to go weird places and find a new patron! You signed a contract! Deal with the consequences. Besides, Thay’s on the no port list. Lennon: So it’s landlocked? Ryu: No!…wait, is it? Ostron: Yes. Ryu: Good to know, but “no port” as in no teleporting! Lennon: Aww, why can’t we go there? Ryu: Do you want a list? Here, we’ve got a list. Thay is becoming a more prominent part of 5th edition lore as time goes on, but it has been around since 1st edition. A 1st edition adventure module called “Dreams of the Red Wizards” (which the more modern Adventurer’s League adventure is loosely based on) was published by TSR in 1988. While it was placed firmly in the…
Heroes Rise, one hundred seventy-fifth entry: Tin Foil Reborn
Welcome, brave adventurers … to the one hundred seventy-fifth entry into our chronicle, recorded on Saturday, July 24th, and released Wednesday, July 28th over at heroesrisepodcast.com.